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Self-expansion model

Psychological theory by Arthur & Elaine Aron

  • 14 min read
  • 4 chapters

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Through Interpersonal relationship, Learning and Career

Relationships are an important area for self-expansion, via a process called inclusion of the other in the self (abbreviated IOS), where aspects of a partner (e.g. traits, skills, attitudes, resources, abilities, and worldviews) are incorporated into one's own self concept. Self-expansion can also take the form of having new and exciting experiences with a partner.

Besides romantic love, opportunities for self-expansion include learning, career, family, friendship, athletics, travel, artistic expression, politics, gossip, religion, and the experience of nature.

The model was developed in the 1980s by the psychologists Arthur Aron and Elaine Aron, as a variant of the reward theory of attraction developed by interpersonal attraction researchers of the 1960s and 1970s. A robust research literature on self-expansion has grown, supporting the idea that people do in fact self-expand by absorbing others into their self-concepts, and that self-expansion contributes to relationship well-being. However, some other features of the Arons' original theory remain untested.

Principles

Motivation

One of the underlying themes of self-expansion is that individuals have a very basic motive to self-expand. Self-expansion is the desire to enhance an individual's potential efficacy. Motivational models often refer to self-efficacy as one's belief that they are competent and can achieve specific goals. Within the self-expansion model, potential efficacy is used instead, as it only refers to obtaining resources that will make goal attainment possible. Achievement of this goal is a secondary concern. Some researchers also believe that the motivation for self-expansion is partly rooted in social approval and acceptance.

However, the motivation to self-expand still does influence attraction to others for a potential close relationship. Aron and Aron suggest that our attraction is broken down into two components based on a value-expectancy approach.

  • Desirability is the perceived total amount of self-expansion possible from a potential close relationship.
  • The second factor, probability, refers to the likelihood that the close relationship with the individual can actually be formed. It can also be conceptualized as the likelihood that self-expansion will occur. Consequently, individuals will seek a partner that has high social status and a greater number of resources. However, to maximize self-expansion, consideration is also given to how likely this person will be loyal and desires to be in the close relationship.

Inclusion of the other in the self

A key principle of the model is that people use close relationships to self-expand by "including the other in the self" (abbreviated IOS). The "self" is often described as the content or the knowledge of who we are. "Others" could be interpreted as individuals. Some studies have found that individuals also include groups or communities.

According to Aron and Aron, when entering a close relationship a person should perceive that the self and other should begin to overlap by including aspects of the other in the self. More specifically, after people include others into themselves, they feel that they have the same resources, ideas, and identity as others, and they will think that the resources, ideas, and identity that others have gained or lost are also what they have gained or lost. These new resources lead to greater inclusion of the other in the self by also incorporating the other's perspectives and identities in the self.

Aron, Aron, Tudor and Nelson conducted several classic studies that scientifically demonstrated that we include the other in the self.

  • In one experiment, participants were more likely to distribute money equally between the self and the close other in comparison to distributing the money between oneself and a stranger. The sharing of resources was suggestive of including the self in the other.
  • In a second experiment, participants were more likely to remember more nouns for a stranger than a close other (one's mother). This supported the IOS phenomenon, as participants were more likely to take the perspective of the close other thus not being able to remember descriptive nouns of that person.
  • In a final experiment participants were required to make yes/no decisions on whether certain traits belonged to themselves. Decisions on traits that were different between a participant and a close other had longer reaction times than decisions on traits that were different between a participant and a stranger.

It was suggested that the increased confusion between the self and the close other was directly related to integrating the other in the self. The degree of closeness in the relationship affects the self and other reaction studies. As two individuals become closer, there is greater confusion and therefore a longer reaction time. As a result, as closeness of a relationship increases, there will be a greater inclusion of the other in the self. Research further shows that such closeness increases overlap between mental representations of self and other, making it harder to differentiate between self‐ and other‐related information, which can impair decision‐making performance and increase cognitive costs in problem‐solving tasks. Such self–other confusion also impairs memory in cooperative decisions: participants made more recall errors when playing trust games with a close partner than with a distant one, especially when they had greater self–other overlap.

Two-dimensional model

A further theory describes relationships changing across two dimensions:

  • direction (whether change is an increase or decrease)
  • valence (whether qualities are considered positive or negative)

These two dimensions combine to make four possible categories, where self-expansion is defined as an increase in positive qualities.

Both self-expansion and self-pruning (where the self improves) are promoted by the Michelangelo phenomenon.

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